Empty

The past week went from being terrible... to being stressful, but not so terrible... to being bearable. The best part - I have Friday off so I have a long weekend to rest and recharge.
Good lord do I need it!

No baby yet. Technically, we started trying in April, so we're going on six months. If you want to get down to the details though, we had some "complications" a couple of the months. We were up in PA for one cycle... then I was in Costa Rica for another. So really, 4 months where we really "tried." But it still sucks. I planned on being pregnant by the end of summer. Now the first 9-weeks of school is over and we're thinking of the holidays already. Depressing. I'm impatient and I hate that day when I know my period is supposed to arrive. I try not to but I always get my hopes up. Then to top it off, I'm off of birth-control (obviously) and that makes my periods feel like DEATH. I literally want to crawl up in a hole and scream in pain.

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately of where I want to be in the next year and what I want to accomplish. Steve told me that I should have a one-year goal and try to stick to it. I keep wavering... but I think that my goal is one of two things: Teach at a new school or Change careers. Just in case finding a new school doesn't work out, I'm going to go on with my plans to take classes at UCF in January.

How I'm going to swing that while I'm going through all this other crap at school is BEYOND me right now. But somehow I will make it work.

Steve's off for the evening at his friends house playing video games, so I'm going to rest and try not to wallow in self-pity all evening.