Grace in Small Things 14/365

1. My husband making an appetizer dinner for us tonite. Hummus, pita, veggies, cold-cuts... yum.

2. This picture:

3. Feeling hope for the next few months. I haven't felt very optimistic in a long time. It's a good feeling!

4. Jaime coming into town in a few weeks! I CANNOT WAIT!!!!

Breathe

It's really hard for me to accept sometimes that I don't have to have the whole next few years of my life planned out completely. It's hard for me to let go and just BREATHE. Stress is ruining my health at the age of 27. It is time for me to make some major changes or I'm going to have major medical problems by the age of 40.

Steve said that I'm much nicer when I'm home in West Palm. I told him that the main reason is that I'm away from work. My job has turned me into a person that I am not proud of. I chew my nails down to the quick and my stomach is constantly in knots. This constant assault on my body that stress is causing is making me ill.

I made some deadlines and goals for myself for the next 6 months or so. I figured that typing everything up and keeping it somewhere visible would be a good plan. That way I don't have any excuses and I can't forget.

Also, I keep thinking about Einstein's definition of insanity. I always joke that my job is making me insane. Well here's the definition: The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Well I've been doing the same thing for three years and expecting things to change and improve and they haven't. So I'm going to have the make the change happen myself.

Just some heavy thoughts for the evening.

To lighten the mood:

Here's a couples of "teasers" from our Trash the Dress photo session with the best photographers in the world! I'll be posting more once I get the disc with all the pics.

Thanksgiving 2009

It is great to be home and spending time with my family. Ate a huge amount of food yesterday and did some major shopping today. Good times!

Grace in Small Things 13/365

1. http://www.bubbalous.com/ - Bubbalou's Bodacious BBQ for dinner. It's got three dancing pigs on the sign. You can get a dish called the "Big Big Pig." How classy can you possibly get! De-li-c-ious!

2. Finding a new gym that has ZUMBA classes. Never heard of Zumba, but after watching for a few minutes I've come to the conclusion that it includes people shaking their arses to Middle Eastern music. I like.

3. Cute little student of mine being my little helper today because I wasn't feeling well. Said student organized the computer area, chairs and then came up to me and asked - "Is there anything else I can help you with Mrs. Heydorn?" Too cute!

4.

Special on National Geographic about the Appalachian Trail. Now I am by no means a nature/outdoorsy person... but this really looked beautiful. Apparently it stretches from Georgia to Maine and people spend 5-6 months hiking the whole length of it. That seems really scary to me... but on the other hand, I can understand why someone would want to experience something like that. My idea of going backpacking is taking the Eurorail through Western Europe. Not as daring but definitely just as exciting!

Grace in Small Things 12/365

1. Edy's Fruit Bars in Coconut. Doesn't matter the season... these things propel me right into the middle of summer again. LOVE it.

2. How I Met Your Mother - this show is hilarious. I love Barney (NPH!), he's hilarious. Also love the nerdy marriage of Lily and Marshall, it makes me think of Steve and I.

3. Homemade sausage and pasta sauce with veggies. My father in law made homemade sausage. How weird is that? It was absolutely delicious though.

4. It's already Wednesday and the weekend is just a couple of days away!

5. The possibility of spending next Halloween in NJ. My cousin is getting married on the 30th of October and I'm thinking we might swing over to Philly and head over to Eastern State for their Halloween festivities!

Grace in Small Things 11/365

Time to pick this up again. I've had a pretty good week so far. My head is full of negative thoughts though about this pregnancy thing. Why do I have so many fertile friends? lol

Anyways, no negativity in this post. Time to focus on the GOOD!

1. OWL CITY - totally, completely in love with this music. I spent the past three weeks literally shunning all the other music on my iPod to listen to Owl City. I now can sing pretty much every word to every song on the CD. You can't be in a bad mood when you listen to it. It simply is not possible.

2.

Adam Levine. He just does it for me. Can't explain why. It's not rational. lol

3. Pumpkin Spice coffee - I have spent the past couple of months completely immersing myself in pumpkin flavored products. Muffins, bread, coffee, tea... doesn't matter. I love it all. Well, I decided that Starbucks' Pumpkin coffee is garbage. Dunkin Donuts definitely has the best one! It's so delicious... I am definitely going to miss it when the season is over.

4. Cooler (and by FL standards that means in the low 80s) weather. Thank gawd. Now I just need it to dip below 65 and I'll truly be happy.

5. Scarves - I wish I could wear one every day. I love the one I bought in Costa Rica from a street vendor. Burgundy, mustard and brown with gold threads sewn through it. It's gorgeous and it makes me think of the awesome time I had there with my girls.

Ahhh. This post made me feel better.

What to expect when you're trying to conceive...

I think I'm going crazy with this trying to make a baby business. I just bought an ovulation microscope. A few months back, a friend of mine on livejournal suggested that I get one instead of using those (really expensive) ovulation predictor strips. She says a friend swore by it and got pregnant once she started using it. I didn't think it sounded very good so I didn't order it at the time. Well, I'm reading this:

And it kinda explained the reasoning behind using it etc etc... so I got online and found one for about $25. I figured... what the hell. At this point, I'm at the half-way point of FREAKING THE HELL OUT... so I don't have much to lose. Plus those ovulation pee-strips are godawful expensive. About 20 bucks a pop for only SEVEN. Whose cycle is that normal that they only need seven? I need like 27 per month to figure out what's going on.

Another gripe of mine: Hearing people's solutions that supposedly got them pregnant quicker than you can say fallopian tube.

"Have sex on the 10th, 12th and 14th day of your cycle. If your husband attempts to touch you on the 11th... 13th... or 15th... tell him to get the hell away from you."

"Stand on your head after sex."

"Don't pee right after doing the deed! You'll flush the little buggers out."

You get the picture. I've tried to lay off the stressin' over this in the past couple of cycles... but lately I'm feeling the babyitis itch coming on with a vengeance. Our original plan: pregnant by July/August. Well kids, it's November already. I'll be surprised if we conceive before the end of the year. This puts me giving birth just in time for the next school year to start. NOT COOL.

Must relax... must relax...

Read my reviews!

I started a blog to review all of the books I read this year. I'm trying to read at least one book a week and so far I'm keeping up with my plan.

Check it out: http://theperfectpage.wordpress.com

I've got a city love...

Steve is off on business in Denver for the week. I miss him horribly, but I'm completely ecstatic that his job is allowing him a lot of opportunities to travel. I am a little jealous of course because I would welcome the chance to hop on a plane to just about anywhere right now.

Today he called me and told me that he's completely enamoured with Denver. He loves the food, the architecture and beauty of the place. Steve has CITY LOVE! I'm so amused because I'm always telling him how much I love the city. I love the feel, smell, and pace of living in the city. I have major city love for pretty much every major city I've been. My latest crush is Philadelphia. He actually told me that he'd move there and that it's now his second favorite city (Taormina being the first. If you don't know about Taormina, look it up. It should be on your list!).

This made me immensely happy because my goal is to move out of Florida one day and experience life somewhere else. Preferably somewhere that is blessed with all four seasons. Not the two seasons that Florida gets - summer and almost summer. The leaves changing... *sigh* I wish we had that here. Steve's always been pretty stuck on the fact that he has no intention of leaving Florida if he can help it. To hear him open up to somewhere else made me smile from ear to ear.

6 Month Mark

6 months of trying for baby and nothing yet. Apparently I'm not supposed to be concerned until a year. Easy for everyone to say when they're not going through it. Steve and I were really sure this was gonna be the month, but I guess it's just not meant to be yet.

FRUSTRATION!