Next Steps

I haven't been feeling so great lately. This infertility thing is like a roller-coaster. Sometimes I'll feel good and positive, and other times I feel like giving up. This week was one of the giving-up times.

The good news is that I start on my fertility drugs next month. The bad news is that now that means that acupuncture and natural stuff didn't work. It's always hard to move on to the next step. I felt the same way before I got to surgery in December. But I guess there's no use putting it off anymore.

Part of the depression is also that my 30th Birthday is looming in the (near) future. I didn't realize how much it would effect me that I'm still not a mother at this point in my life.

Everything else is going well... school is busy as always. This semester is going by very quickly - before I know it I'll be a 3L. :)

Here goes nothing

I gave in. I'll be starting on Femara and HcG shots next month hopefully. I can't take it anymore. My heart is broken, I am tired... so tired of the ache to be a mother and the frustration of not being able to do anything to make it happen.

Why am I having to go through this?

Fertility drugs and such

I'm a generally impatient person... trying to get pregnant for over two years = pure torture.

We decided we are going to try for 4 cycles (once I get back to normal from the surgery) before getting on the medication.

My doctor wants to try 3-5 days of Femara and then one HcG shot on day 5. I did a bit of research today about Femara and a lot of women have had success. It supposedly will inhibit my estrogen, amp up my progesterone, and get my body to develop some of the follicles in my ovaries to release. Once that happens, the shot on day 5 will get my body to release the egg.

I'm hopeful... but worried about money and such. I'm going to try and get my taxes done quickly so that we can use the refund to pay for it. Here's to trying something new and hoping that it works...

I'm ready to be a momma!

The Truth About Trying

Here we go again

So, I ended up having a very long cycle - 36 days. The doc thinks it was just a fluke because my system is in shock from the surgery. So this month is our real first GOOD chance since the surgery.

I am not feeling very optimistic, but we need to try as best as we can until April or May... That's our self-imposed deadline on using the injectables. So let's see what nature has in store!

Where are you AF?

So I am on day 32... no period. However, no positive on the pregnancy tests I've taken either. So I'm stuck in some awful limbo trying to figure out what the heck is going on. WHY CAN'T MY BODY JUST BE NORMAL???

I had acupuncture today and she told me to keep testing and not to give up home... but of course that is easier said than done.

Fingers crossed.

Testing, Testing, 123

Hubs's test came back 100% NORMAL! Thank god - some good news finally.

I was really happy that everything was OK, because now we can just focus on getting my issues resolved. While I was happy about that - I did feel a little sad for a few minutes because now it's confirmed that I am completely the reason why we are unable to get pregnant.

Luckily, my husband is understanding and doesn't think less of me. But of course, I am the one who is hard on myself.

Which... brings me to my New Year's Resolution = to stop being so damn hard on myself!